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Sunday, July 29, 2018

We Do Our Best

I was judged yesterday. I'm sure there are things daily that people silently judge me about, but this was a verbal judgement, to my face.  It was one of those moments that caught me off guard.

"Don't you think it's kind of selfish for you to be spending time going to school and not with your daughter?"


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Selfish?  I had never really thought about it that way, no.

In 2013, I made the decision to go back to school.  After some not so great advice, I decided to get a "business certificate", which involved taking some basic business courses (accounting, finance, economics, etc).  I had made this decision after my husband decided to go in to business for himself, and I found myself in the role of human resources/payroll administrator/book keeper, etc.  I figured these courses would give me the basic knowledge I would need to help my husband in his business.

When I was about a year in to my certificate, someone asked me why I was dedicating so much time to a business certificate, when I could be working towards an MBA.  I thought about it for a while - well, an MBA could not only help with the knowledge I needed for my husband's business, but could also help me grow my career.  So I went for it.  In 2015, I enrolled in an MBA program.  I have been working towards my degree since then.  It's been many, many, many hours of reading, studying, group work, papers, assignments, and classes.  There have been tears and triumphs along the way.

Do I know that this takes me away from other things I could be doing in my life, including some family time, yes.  And some may consider that selfish.  I choose to look at it differently.

My working towards my MBA is (hopefully) doing these things:

- Making me a more confident person.  I had always told myself that I didn't think I could get my MBA because I wasn't a "numbers person".  I have proven myself wrong.

- It's showing my daughter that if we work hard, we can achieve great things.

- It's helping me in my career that I need to help provide for my family.

Those are just a few of what I perceive as major benefits.

Don't get me wrong.  There are some days that it's hard... really hard.  And I don't mean just the academic challenge - I mean the days that I would much rather just lay down and watch a movie with my daughter, but I need to write a paper instead.

I still spend time with my family, and we still have lots of fun together.  Because my family is a priority.

Going to school doesn't make me selfish, I think it makes me stronger.

So thank you to the person who asked me that question.  It made me have a hard look at why I'm doing what I'm doing, and reminded me that I need to keep going.

Sometimes we all need that reminder.

So for any of you feeling judged - we're all doing our best.  You are doing great.  Keep it up.

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